Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Dreaming
I think we all dream of finding that relationship that makes our heart soar. What we fail to realize though is that the people we surround ourselves with, help us grow and figure out the types of things we actually really want in a relationship. That being said, what is some of the best advice you've received from friends, relatives, etc?
Thursday, October 1, 2009
New Beginnings
Hi, I'm Ashley. I'm new to the blogging thing. A friend invited me to join, so bare with me. The most significant relationships in my life at the moment are with my 8 month old puppy and the relationship I have with myself.
My Dachshund puppy, Orion, and I are still in the crucial phase of building our relationship. Though i think we're firmly on our way in the whole bonding department :-), we're still feeling eachother out in many ways. I'm working on training him to only go to the bathroom on the wee-wee pads or outside, to sit, lie down, and come when I ask him to, and to not bark at almost every single person or animal we pass while walking lol. Hopefully he is growing to see me as the pack leader and as his Mommy who will give him plenty of love and affection, guidance, and make him feel secure.
Continuing to develop a good relationship with myself is also very important to me. The only person that you have to be with all the time is yourself after all. I try to learn something new about myself everyday and learn to accept, love, and be at peace with what I find. I'm in the phase of my life where I'm still fighting to establish myself as an adult and find my place in the world. I've made some decisions that sometimes I wish I could go back and make over...but then I realize that to mourn for what might have been is completely useless. If I hadn't made the decisions I did and things hadn't unfolded as they did, then I wouldn't be where I am now...and I wouldn't be who I am now. All we can do in life, is make the most of what we have to work with at any given moment. I'm learning that people have to accomplish things at their own pace and figure out the unique path that's right for them.
I made a few of what I believe to be very good decisions over the past year (that included a move to a new city very different from what I was used to, living away from family for the first time, and coming out and experiencing my first real romantic relationship) that have allowed me to have wonderfully eye-opening experiences and learn so much about myself. I think this has now brought me to the place where I'm at another crossroads and am ready for another change, another adventure....one major part of that change being finally being ready to choose a career path that will hopefully help me be happy and fulfilled, and like I'm serving my purpose....instead of just working JOBS.
My Dachshund puppy, Orion, and I are still in the crucial phase of building our relationship. Though i think we're firmly on our way in the whole bonding department :-), we're still feeling eachother out in many ways. I'm working on training him to only go to the bathroom on the wee-wee pads or outside, to sit, lie down, and come when I ask him to, and to not bark at almost every single person or animal we pass while walking lol. Hopefully he is growing to see me as the pack leader and as his Mommy who will give him plenty of love and affection, guidance, and make him feel secure.
Continuing to develop a good relationship with myself is also very important to me. The only person that you have to be with all the time is yourself after all. I try to learn something new about myself everyday and learn to accept, love, and be at peace with what I find. I'm in the phase of my life where I'm still fighting to establish myself as an adult and find my place in the world. I've made some decisions that sometimes I wish I could go back and make over...but then I realize that to mourn for what might have been is completely useless. If I hadn't made the decisions I did and things hadn't unfolded as they did, then I wouldn't be where I am now...and I wouldn't be who I am now. All we can do in life, is make the most of what we have to work with at any given moment. I'm learning that people have to accomplish things at their own pace and figure out the unique path that's right for them.
I made a few of what I believe to be very good decisions over the past year (that included a move to a new city very different from what I was used to, living away from family for the first time, and coming out and experiencing my first real romantic relationship) that have allowed me to have wonderfully eye-opening experiences and learn so much about myself. I think this has now brought me to the place where I'm at another crossroads and am ready for another change, another adventure....one major part of that change being finally being ready to choose a career path that will hopefully help me be happy and fulfilled, and like I'm serving my purpose....instead of just working JOBS.
That perfect relationship...
originally posted by beakybuzzard18:
The relationship that jumps into my mind at this moment is the relationship I share with my husband. I think there is a huge misconception that is being passed down from generation from generation that leads people to believe that you will meet someone, go out for them, like them, come to love them, and then bam, you are in the perfect relationship. When I say perfect relationship I mean that fairytale fantasy that says that your partner will be able to read your mind, you both will think alike all the time and they will supply you with unlimited happiness. That's horse pucky! There is no relationship that exists where two people don't have to work at it. My husband and I are very different people. I love to read and manage to read 1000 page novels in three days. He reads a page a week. I'm an introvert, he's an extrovert. I'm calm and rational, he's very reactive. And before you say anything about that crap, opposites attract, you can just save it. I love my husband very, very much and if the two of us weren't focused on communicating and making things work between us (me giving 100%, him giving 100%, none of that 50/50 bull)then we wouldn't be married. We are both very stubborn and we love each other enough that we aren't just going to sit on our butts and see where things go. We know what we want, and we are going to work at getting it. We want to be married for the next 50 years: so we are going to talk, I'm going to be more outgoing, he's going to be more rational, I'm going to support his ideas, he's going to help me cope with stress. We aren't changing ourselves, we're just adjusting to what the other needs, getting out of our comfort zones so to speak.
The relationship that jumps into my mind at this moment is the relationship I share with my husband. I think there is a huge misconception that is being passed down from generation from generation that leads people to believe that you will meet someone, go out for them, like them, come to love them, and then bam, you are in the perfect relationship. When I say perfect relationship I mean that fairytale fantasy that says that your partner will be able to read your mind, you both will think alike all the time and they will supply you with unlimited happiness. That's horse pucky! There is no relationship that exists where two people don't have to work at it. My husband and I are very different people. I love to read and manage to read 1000 page novels in three days. He reads a page a week. I'm an introvert, he's an extrovert. I'm calm and rational, he's very reactive. And before you say anything about that crap, opposites attract, you can just save it. I love my husband very, very much and if the two of us weren't focused on communicating and making things work between us (me giving 100%, him giving 100%, none of that 50/50 bull)then we wouldn't be married. We are both very stubborn and we love each other enough that we aren't just going to sit on our butts and see where things go. We know what we want, and we are going to work at getting it. We want to be married for the next 50 years: so we are going to talk, I'm going to be more outgoing, he's going to be more rational, I'm going to support his ideas, he's going to help me cope with stress. We aren't changing ourselves, we're just adjusting to what the other needs, getting out of our comfort zones so to speak.
Insight
Trying to decipher what exactly a relationship is, is complicated. There isn't one set definition except in the dictionary, because we all view it differently. That being said, I think I need to clarify the idea behind this. We all have relationships and they're all different. I want to try and capture that. It doesn't matter if you haven't had years of dating experience or if you have just come out, or even if you've been married for years. Its the relationships that make up who YOU are as a person. Its all of them, your friends, your family, yes even your beloved pet! Each and every relationship we hold dear in our life is unique. Being able to capture that and share it, lets others see it from a different angle. That's the whole idea in a nut shell. Feel free to follow the blog and even send me an email if you're interested in joining.
mystery
I have yet to figure relationships out. Which is like trying to figure out how to make an atom bomb. At least it is to me. I turn into this rambling crazy person who more than likely pushes people away. Gets harder still when you throw your gay montra and all hell breaks lose. I like to think that sooner or later I'll find that silver lining. That little thing that clears away all the fog and mystery and lets you see the beautiful garden on the other side.
Is there really something on the other side? Or is it just more mystery?
Is there really something on the other side? Or is it just more mystery?
relationships
relationships, that word can mean so many different things.
a relationship between a child and a parent
or a relationship between lovers, married or not, gay or not...
or even a relationship you have with a co-worker
a relationship to me only means that you care about that person whether it be a friend, a significant other, a parent, a grandparent, a child or even a pet. and throughout the next few weeks/ months, I will be talking about the relationships in my life and what makes a relationship work or not...
this is just the beginning, a glimpse into what's to come...
a relationship between a child and a parent
or a relationship between lovers, married or not, gay or not...
or even a relationship you have with a co-worker
a relationship to me only means that you care about that person whether it be a friend, a significant other, a parent, a grandparent, a child or even a pet. and throughout the next few weeks/ months, I will be talking about the relationships in my life and what makes a relationship work or not...
this is just the beginning, a glimpse into what's to come...
Relationships...
I love to write about anything in the world. I thought of this idea a couple days ago. And have been trying to figure out how to go about getting it started, which brings me to this site. I’ve thought about relationships and how they change and evolve over time. Its all about relationships. What their made of, what it takes to keep them alive and thriving or what happens when they fall apart. It can be anything ranging from a married couple to those just starting out or to the ones who are struggling. I want to know everything, all the little quirks and things that you’ve learned. what exactly makes it different if your single or if your gay or if your struggling to keep your relationship alive. Anything and everything that plays into relationships and how they shape our lives is the main idea here. My idea mainly is I want to have people write about their relationships for roughly 4 – 6 months then take everything and weave it into a book. If they allow me to that is. It might be crazy, but it might be the most amazing and interesting book you’ll ever read.
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